We were able to convince the Judge to speak with the children privately because of conflicting versions of what I was saying and what she was saying in court. One of us was lying (of course, she was), so about three or four times my lawyer pleaded with the Judge to please talk to the children. When you present it as we did, Talk to them privately, no parents, relatives, or lawyers in the room, and rule that any discussion with the children regarding their conversation with the Judge will be considered contempt of court, it is easy for the Judge to say, “why not?”.
Regarding the Psy exam, in my case my ex-wife took them to a Doctor who performed some Psy tests on them (written) and in 1.5 hours came up with conclusions from these tests. The children expressed to me that they were scared to say what they really wanted to say because they knew this doctor will tell Mom what they said.
I on the other hand took them to a doctor who just sat with them and talked PRIVATELY. They were aware that whatever they say was for them to get it out and not to make a report for Mom and Dad. They had a total of about 3 visits each.
This Psy was subpoenaed to appear in court and acted as my witness, the credibility of the other Psy was chattered in court.
ALWAYS do things with the mentality that you are doing it for your child and not for you. Any Judge would immediately realize that you put your children first and not yourself.